I'm Just Done for Now
by NullVoice678
Summary: LeviHan: The lance-corporal makes the mistake of bothering Hanji 7:00 am in the morning.


**A/N: ****I was really bored, and I didn't wanna draw... So here's some LeviHan for all of you**

** This fic is a gigantic spoiler to those who have not read at least until Chapter 50 of SNK **

** so for those who don't want to be spoiled **_(unless Tumblr already did that for you)_

** you may kick yourselves out now, please and thank you.**

** You will also need to know in order to get the puns.**

**I was so high when I wrote this... **

**Should I have rated it T? There's a few creative vulgar words here.**

**Never write late at night, your brain picks up on weird stuff.**

* * *

**(the sun rises in the background)**

Hanji woke up to another fuzzy morning in the Survey Corps, where the death rate is unusually high and where you will surely face your assured death upon a titan. Preferably an Aberrant.

So a few weeks before, Levi's entire squad and a few hundred others died, failed to capture the female titan, and were going to give up Eren to the Military Police to be dissected and examined inside out by a bunch of grown men in lab suits.

The good news is that Armin and the others discovered that the female titan was Annie, the wall was made out of titans, Pastor Nick was involved with it, and Krista's name is Historia.

Wall Rose broke open again, with Mike and Nanaba dying along the way, and Erwin's arm got ripped off.

And then Bertholdt and Reiner turned out to be the Colossal and Armored titans too. Along with Ymir, and the discovery of an ape-titan.

It was an intense turn of events that just happened so suddenly

that Hanji could simply not believe it.

...

She could just imagine a montage of how lives fucked up 5 years ago until now. Everything was going so very fast, too fast for the young scientist to pace. It's as if there was someone, out there, probably an author, who was writing the story of their lives as if to make every chapter intense as possible. He might be laughing at himself right now at his work.

It was getting on her nerves, and if she doesn't get a break right now, oh yes.

It will be the end of her.

So for now, coffee, arranging documents that Moblit (her butler) has to fix, and probably piss off Levi on the way to work.

Hanji changed out of her nightgown and into her regular uniform. The same uniform she never bothered to wash in a long time.

Priority number Levi: check.

She walked along the halls, entered the spacious kitchen to await Petra with steaming cups of coffee fresh from the-

-Oh wait, Petra's dead.

Stuck between a groan and a wail of discouragement, Hanji proceeded to make coffee of her own.

...

She began to scour through the cabinets and the cupboards, until she was able to assemble a mug, a teaspoon, and a small packet of coffee.

The chocolate-haired girl began to pour hot water, from a kettle she set up, into her mug. She opened the packet of coffee and mixed the drink using her teaspoon. She took a sip.

It was so unbelievably bitter to Hanji. She almost spit her up drink from the horrible taste.

How in the world did this Petra make this properly?

"This definitely needs some sugar" Hanji thought to herself.

...

"What the flying fuck is up with all the ruckus?" the lance-corporal cursed at the beautiful morning through his window.

The sounds of cabinets being flung open and then closed suddenly inside the kitchen kept bothering Levi to no end.

Levi was still recovering from losing his whole squad to a titan (with a hot ass) in ONE day. He just wanted nothing to bother from a nice, peaceful rest in his bed.

Grunting, he got up and dressed up in his uniform, and went to the kitchen.

He peeked around the doorway to find the idiot that was responsible. It could definitely, possibly be-

"_Whoops!"_

-yes it was Hanji. Of COURSE it was Hanji, Levi face-palmed.

"Oh, hello there Rivaille!" Hanji peeked her head out from a large cabinet "What brings you here to this glorious morning?"

"What the hell are you trying to do now Hanji?" he spoke with a stoic face and tone.

Hanji approached to the wooden table, where sat a ceramic mug, steaming of coffee. She raised it up, and pointed it in front of the corporal.

Levi mentally decided he wanted to get some coffee too. Maybe later.

"It was too _bitter_ so I was looking for some sugar to put in my drink." Hanji replied.

Sighing frustrated, Levi proceeded to leave the kitchen.

"I guess you could say we're a bit **_short _**on supplies."

What. No.

"Stop that right fucking now Hanji." Levi spoke. He knew ever since he met Hanji, if you could make her deprived enough from boredom, she would start making puns. **Of.** **every**. **single**_._** fucking.** **thing**.

"Ermag**ERD**, Heichou. You don't need to be such a spoil sport."

_Ohno_

Why couldn't she just go back doing research or some shit like that?

"Hanji-"

"Hey, if you **Ral**-ly an **arm**y, will you **Mike** them wear armor?"

She's seriously making puns about Erwin's arm, AND his dead squad, Petra in particular. In front of Levi. Levi Heichou. The strongest of all humanity. She was taunting him in front of his face. The puns she were making weren't even that _good._

Why was he just letting her continue?

"Hanji I swear I will cut off your yapping, little-"

"Sorry to **Reiner** your parade, Levi. I'm just Bertelling you what I **Berthold** him." Hanji's tone raised.

Not even the titan-shifters were spared.

Hanji slugged her arm beside Levi.

"Two is company, **Tree**'s a crowd huh, Heichou?"

Levi expression was so distorted of pain and annoyance that it was almost fascinating to look at. He was at his limits. If the walls would actually did something to shut her then maybe he would be part of that stupid wall-cult club.

"Do you know what the other name of faeries are? **Pixis.**

...Okay that was actually pretty good.

But that was the last straw.

Levi walked to open a cabinet, reaching for something. There we go, he plucked out a nice butcher's knife-

"Don't tell me you're good at slicing up flesh too, Rivaille?"

He slowly stalked at Hanji with the murder tool.

"Mankind does not require your stupid puns, Shitty Glasses"

...

Erwin was just relaxing in the outdoors outside the clinic of the Survey Corps settlement. Birds were chirping off the distance, and the nice green forest was a nice change of scenery compared to blood-thirsty titans.

He finally had the strength to go out a bit and, despite everything that happened, he was a bit at peace at the moment. He began to think about who the next Survey Corps leader should be, he wondered-

His thoughts were interrupted by the screams of a scientist in the distance, being chased by a midget with a rather large knife.

"Okay I get Levi, you're Erwin-ner already!" the glasses-girl was hoping he was joking-

"Shut up and let me end you, Shitty Glasses"- but the tone of his voice was oozing with seriousness

The screams faded, the faint chirping of birds returned to the Squad Leader's ears.

"Erwinner?" Erwin thought. He could use that for a Survey Corps Enlistment poster.

* * *

**A/N: ****I bet we can all agree that Annie's titan form has a hot ass.**


End file.
